


and because of you (i don't lead myself astray)

by Lineal



Series: poem fics! [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Based on a Poem, Ficlet, Gen, Introspection, Iwaizumi Hajime is a Good Friend, M/M, hes toorus limit im so soft rn, uhhh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 06:15:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28613433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lineal/pseuds/Lineal
Summary: and when i try once moreto push my upper limityou stand there in front of megiving me another minuteto realign my thoughtsto shove my shoulders backi gather up my strengthand i prepare for an attackbut before i charge into the frayyou stand in front of me and say,“you know, this can wait another day,”and because of youi don’t lead myself astray
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime & Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Series: poem fics! [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2050644
Comments: 8
Kudos: 6





	and because of you (i don't lead myself astray)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stephbethallen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stephbethallen/gifts).



> Inspired by [stephbethallen's](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stephbethallen) poem!!!
> 
> queen of writing beautiful poems about inanimate objects

Limits are strange things, really, and boundaries are even harder for Tooru to fully comprehend.

Just the fact that humans are supposed to know their own— when to stop, when things get too much for them to handle, how much they know— and for some reason, it seems like he’s the only person who doesn’t.

How is he supposed to when he’s pretty sure he’s never really hit his “limit” before anyway? Don’t these things come with experience, not instinct?

Hajime seems to think so— that Tooru _should_ know, that he shouldn’t have to experiment to see and maybe get hurt in the process. 

But to Tooru, it’s different. To Tooru, _Hajime_ is his limit, not some line or cliff or string cut too short, _he’s_ the one to stop Tooru when things get too much and he’s seconds away from another injury, another hole in the dam he’s managed to build up to keep his other “limits” away— where all of his pain and doubt have accumulated so much that he can no longer recognize it as his own anymore, threatening to spill over at a moment’s notice.

Hajime’s the one to hold him back with gentle nudges and most times, not so gentle jabs and words, but it’s always comforting all the same. He’s the one to stand in front of Tooru, shielding him when needed, giving him time to breathe, to gather up his strength to face tomorrow, prepare for an attack, the doom looming over him.

Hajime’s the one to take him by the shoulders when he hunches them forward, pushing them back so he can stand taller, stronger. He’s the one who makes sure Tooru doesn’t charge into the fray prematurely with no protection, no way to defend himself, no time to prepare and make sure he’s ready.

Tooru can rely on Hajime, so he doesn’t need a “limit.” It’s such a simple concept, yet he’s the only person who actually understands it. Others just don’t _get it_ , not even Hajime, though Tooru supposes that it’s fair, seeing how he doesn’t quite get their concept of “limits” either. 

It’s okay. People don’t necessarily need to agree or be the same to coexist.

He and Hajime have been doing it just fine for the past sixteen years or so of their lives.

Hajime is Tooru’s shield, his armor and his knight, a boundary between him and chaos, him and pain, him and any distress that may be thrown his way. Hajime is Tooru’s break, his breath of fresh air, giving him a moment to realign his thoughts and build up his strength.

And when Tooru needs more than just a moment, more than just that single breath, Hajime will stand in front of him, arms crossed, unwavering, and Tooru won’t be able to pass, run straight outside where he’ll be exposed at his most vulnerable state.

“You know,” Hajime always says, gruff yet almost pleading at the same time. “This can wait another day.”

And Tooru nods along, sometimes more willingly than others, and he sits, watching as the thousands of open doors close and keep all the bad thoughts and overworking away.

He doesn’t need to rush. Tooru can just take things a day at a time; there’s no need to test his “limits” and that’s what Hajime keeps trying to tell him.

Tooru doesn’t have “limits,” he has Hajime, and he can and will keep saying that over and over again until someone else finally manages to understand it.

And besides, Hajime is so much better than any old condescending “limit.” He actually exists— an obvious reason, really, so why are people still confused?— and although Tooru never says anything, he doesn’t fail to notice Hajime trying to patch up the dam and picking up stray thoughts that may have slipped by it either. He never misses how Hajime tries to take some for himself, tries to keep them as far away from Tooru as possible.

And Tooru never forgets that it’s because of _him_ that he doesn’t lead himself astray.

**Author's Note:**

> it was. a door.
> 
> Thanks for reading!!!!!
> 
> ALSO IM WORKING ON PIANO LESSONS I SWEAR I AMJFKDGH
> 
> Here is my [Discord](https://discord.gg/E8rnymG) and my [Tumblr](https://itslinsanity.tumblr.com/)!!!


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